Articles

Rethinking Nostalgic Postpartum Advice

Nostalgic postpartum advice is certainly permissible, though it’s not always beneficial or edifying (1 Cor. 10:23). But when we take care to know a mother’s world before speaking to it, we can help her feel seen and understood. We can better encourage and build her up in Christ—whether she’s enjoying the season or not (1 Thess. 5:11).
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7 months ago

Christmas Hope and Your Suffering: Advent Devotional

Hope can feel hard to come by during the holidays, especially when you’re wracked with pain or weighed down with grief. Yes, it might be “the most wonderful time of the year” for some. But for others, it’s a season when wonderful times seem both far behind and far beyond them. Perhaps you fall into this latter category. If so, the incarnation may not seem like a relevant consolation. But consider this comforting truth as you weep and lament: Jesus wasn’t born to fail but to prove himself faithful.
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9 months ago

God’s Grace for Mom’s Unmerry Holiday

While the reasons for these seasonal struggles will vary from family to family, the need to depend on God’s sustaining grace remains the same. Thankfully, he doesn’t begrudge your neediness but welcomes it wholeheartedly! God knows that holidays can be hard days—that you can only endure them if he daily bears you up. Here are three specific ways that God ministers his grace to you during your unmerry holiday.
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9 months ago

God is Not Surprised by Your Postpartum Depression

When you feel overtaken by sorrow in motherhood, it’s good to remember that you are seen and surrounded by God. There are much-needed reminders about this reality in Psalm 139. As the writer marvels at God’s omniscience and omnipresence, at least three relevant applications to the experience of postpartum depression unfold.
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12 months ago

11 Free Resources on Biblical Lament

Biblical lament is something I've taught, spoken, and written about a number of times, but only recently did I come to realize that I had enough lament-related resources to share in one post! On this page, you'll find a few interviews from the Hope + Help Podcast archives on the topic of lament, as well as a number of articles that will help you to think more deeply about the topic. In addition, this post features two printables—one of which is brand new.
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1 year ago

The Gift and Skill of Praise in Lament

If you don’t tend to associate groaning to God with giving Him thanks, you’re not the only one. I confess there have been times when praising the Lord was nowhere near the top of my mind in my sorrow. But over the years, the Spirit has helped me to better understand these two contrasting ways of addressing our Heavenly Father—to see that we needn’t sacrifice praise on the altar of lament (or vice versa). Even our most desperate cries can be “couched in praise,” just as “[in] the context of praise, lament and even protest can be an important function of faith.”
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1 year ago

3 palabras de ánimo para madres deprimidas

Si le preguntara a una madre que lucha contra la depresión: "¿Cuánto tiempo más te sentirás tan mal?", su respuesta probablemente no sería “Sólo una o dos horas más. ¡Ya casi termino!” La depresión no funciona de esa manera. Los estados de ánimo melancólicos no suelen desaparecer. Las soluciones rápidas tienden a quedarse cortas cuando el dolor nos quita las fuerzas; los clichés bien intencionados generalmente tampoco dan en el blanco (Prov. 17:22; 25:20). Y cuando las supuestas palabras de ánimo empiezan a oírse más como regaños pasivos, puede parecer que nadie tiene nada útil que decir, como si tuviéramos que valernos por nosotros mismos en esta oscuridad.
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1 year ago

15 Free Biblical Resources (and One Book) for Mental Disorders

Do you know what it is for a psychiatric diagnosis to throw you into a tailspin? I do. But I also know a God who offers stabilizing truths for the post-diagnosis journey—a God who makes his people fruitful in the land of their affliction (Gen. 41:52). In this post, you will find a collection of resources that seek to apply the gospel of Jesus Christ to the lived experience of issues labeled as mental disorders, as well as a new counseling card entitled "5 Gospel Realities to Remember When You've Been Diagnosed with a Mental Disorder."
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1 year ago

You Lamented—Now What?

“There’s a lot of talk about how to lament these days, but what do we do after—what comes next?” My friend’s question was intriguing. He was right to identify the need for extended reflection. After all, the moments following lament are just as important as the pain-pressed prayers themselves. We must choose to do something next, so what will it be? Withdraw in self-pity? Lash out at loved ones? Self-medicate with creature comforts? Give ourselves over to the futility of restlessness or the fruitlessness of resignation? We need wisdom, lest the choices we make do more harm than good. Because all of life is lived before God, how we move forward from lament truly matters. So what wisdom does he offer to us in these fragile and frustrated moments?
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2 years ago

Free Resources for Depressed Moms

This post contains articles, audios, videos, and downloads which were published during the launch of Midnight Mercies. All of these resources are free to access and available to freely share.
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2 years ago

4 Ways to Help a Depressed Mom

Surely somewhere in your close proximity, there’s a mother suffering from depression. As she attempts to beat back the darkness, you wonder how you can care for her. As featured at The Gospel Coalition.
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2 years ago

When the Clock Strikes Midnight: 3 Encouragements for Depressed Moms

If you’re feeling desperate for encouragement as you walk through the darkness of depression, I’d like to pass along a few statements which ministered to me. The Spirit used each of these fitly spoken words to give me strength and insight on my journey. By God’s mercy and grace, I pray they will serve you just the same. As featured at Risen Motherhood.
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2 years ago

BCC Blog: Why I Wrote Midnight Mercies

My intent is that any mother who knows what it’s like to groan, "I feel depressed" will find comfort and counsel in these pages. As featured at the Biblical Counseling Coalition.
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2 years ago

Three Benefits of Audio-Based Homework

In this article, I suggest three benefits for utilizing audio-based assignments, particularly in situations where counselees are suffering from the kind of cognitive impairment that makes concentration and comprehension extremely difficult.
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2 years ago

How Do I Talk to My Kids About Sorrow?

Forewarning our kids about the realities of sorrow can forearm them to face it by faith. Christ said these seasons would come, and that we would find comfort, hope, and peace by looking to him when they do.
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5 years ago

How Is God Working in My Teen’s Depression?

If you’ve found yourself caring for a depressed teen, maybe you’re wondering what God is up to in the midst of this heartbreaking time. While we cannot know all the ways that God intends to work in your teen’s despondency, the Scriptures do tell us what his goal is for you in this season.
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5 years ago

Discipling Our Children in Their Suffering

It’s disorienting when a child is suffering. Our parental instinct is to come to our children’s rescue and “make it better.” But life lived in a fallen world means that we cannot always protect our children from disease and death. Money and medicine has its limitations. The truth is that our children are not immune to experiencing the effects of the curse on this world, which means they will look to those charged with their care for comfort, hope, and help when suffering strikes.
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5 years ago

Death Will Come When Christ Calls

It was not until I became a follower of Christ that my perspective on death changed, and I came to understand it as something more than an instrument of destruction. In Christ, death is no doomsday — it’s a gateway.
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6 years ago

Making Church a Safe Place for Sorrow

While Revelation 21 specifically lists death, mourning, crying, and pain as fundamental grievances believers will face, there's a shocking lack of corporate preparation to meet with such sorrows. Removing the stigma of deeply painful sadness requires the local church’s unhurried commitment to making room for it on Sunday mornings and a desire to equip leaders in one-another care.
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6 years ago

How to Talk to Your Depressed Child

As parents, we can’t take the place of medical professionals, licensed counselors, or pastoral care. A child’s depressed feelings can indicate ordinary sadness or a more serious disorder, and we’ll typically need outside help to identify the nature of our child’s struggle. But parents do have something valuable to offer: love and encouragement.
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6 years ago

Beware of Taking Your Sorrows to Alcohol Before God

Drinking to drown our sorrows, contrary to the chart-topping songs, is a dangerous—potentially deadly—way to respond to seasons of excessive sadness. Alcohol won’t lay its life down for us, but it can demand we lay down our life for it.
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6 years ago

Four Sustaining Graces for Seasons of Depression

It’s true, the experience of depression is exhausting—both physically and spiritually. We find ourselves desperately feeling around for a light switch that we may finally land our fingers on a toggle. But alas, there are no quick remedies for instantly illuminating our gloom—no switch to flip, no immediate assuage of our pain. Yet, while depression is a season where our capabilities may be diminished, there are small sustaining graces to partake of which can carry us along while we wait.
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6 years ago

Walking Our Children Through Depression: Four Ways We Imitate God

Mental health issues can be complex in nature, and parents can run the risk of overlooking particular facets of treatment because of prejudices about underlying causes. But when we look to the Scriptures and see God serving the sorrowing with individualized, calculated affection, we see a multifaceted approach to managing mental anguish — one that acknowledges the dichotomy of man (as body and soul) and the necessity of the body of Christ.
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6 years ago

Wretched Extremes: The ‘Always’ and ‘Never’ of Suicide

Extremes of wretchedness. Charles Spurgeon once said, “I am the subject of depressions of spirit so fearful that I hope none of you ever get to such extremes of wretchedness as I go to.” Suicidal ideations often begin in the crosshairs of extremes, where always and never intersect. The wretched “always be this way” and […]
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7 years ago

Lay Your Weapon Down: Invitation to Cutters (Desiring God Feature)

I was recently privileged to share a piece of my heart at John Piper’s website DesiringGod.org. This article is meant to give readers a glimpse into the heart struggle of a Christian tempted to self-harm, as well as the intimate love and affection that Jesus has for such ones who struggle in this fashion. The battle is presented […]
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8 years ago